The need to create a musical instrument has become almost an all-consuming obsession. I was given a miniature tambourine and rattle by my sister, but due to their size and construction, I haven’t been able to use them. My mother gave me a larger tambourine and hand drum, and I have spent many hours imagining how I would alter them to create a customized magical tool.
The drum has a handle on it, but it feels wrong. I want to remove it so that I can grasp the drum by the frame — and hang charms or other objects where the handle was. It also has wire springs inside that create a rasping sound when it is played, but I am not sure if I should remove them or not. There is also a price written on it, and a price tag on one side that needs to go. The frame and skin appears to be plastic, which saddens me because I had hoped to find or procure a drum made of natural materials in order to paint, wood burn, or decorate it properly. But at this time I can’t afford to buy a wooden frame drum with a goat or calf’s skin head.
I haven’t started working on the drum yet due to time constrains, I want to ritually work each step carefully, so that it dedicates it to me, and establishes a relationship with the drum.
The tambourine is more difficult to work with, or to alter in part because of the zils that grace its sides are a harsh, almost angry sound. I tried holding it but the energy coursing off this instrument was not welcoming or happy. Small wonder considering it was given to me by my mother, anything she has given me has felt similar. I want to heal its pain, but I am not sure how. I will have to sit with it and try to determine the exact cause for it to be so upset, and how I can help to fix it.
Maybe once I can clean them both up, and interact with them, then I will know more.