Honoring Loki today is special because this is the anniversary of marrying my husband. I have always felt that everything that has happened in my life led me to where I needed to be for my husband to come along. And I firmly believe that Loki helped nudge us along to get there.
Before I met my husband I had just broken up with my high-school sweetheart who I reconnected with after moving over 3,000 miles away, getting married and divorced, and having a child. We moved in with him and lived across the country from my old life for almost a year, but he was woefully unprepared for being a parent, and even though he asked me to marry him, things just didn’t work out like planned (it was an utter shit-storm of epic proportions that I won’t get into now). So I moved back home that fall, and set about trying to find work, swearing off relationships, love, and everything else. I had signed up for online dating as a way to maybe find a girlfriend, but planned on nothing more.
But fate and Loki had other ideas, and we met in the winter of 2008. Our first messages were ones we sent simultaneously to each other, without realizing the other had sent one as well. I remember reading his profile, laughing at some of his jokes, and being intrigued because of his eyes, the fact that he was a writer/security guard at a hospital, a parent, and had zombie contingency plans. Our first conversation was about working in the medical field, and imagining how things would go if zombies happened at his job, or at the hospital I lived near.
Before long we were talking online constantly, and I bought a prepaid phone to text him so we could stay in touch. I was afraid of commitment or being in love, so I refused to admit my feelings for 4 months. I was stubborn, and even with every sign pointing towards him being the perfect fit, I was still the last to see or admit that I was in love. Loki (without knowing it was Him) kept showing me dreams and visions of happiness, and one night after fighting with my family about dating my husband, I sobbed into my pillows a plea just to be happy. That was the catalyst, and the next time we talked, I proposed. And he said yes.
Our marriage has been a winding journey through being geeky, reading books, moving across the country more than once, the birth of two of our three daughters, monetary perils, near homelessness, and tons of chaos being tossed our way. But whatever we have encountered has been an adventure, making our relationship closer and stronger. I know I can depend on him to support me, call me on any bullshit, have fun with, teach me to play video games, accept myself, and smile. All thanks to Loki.
Hail Loki, deliverer of my husband, and welcome as family in our home.
(I will do my best to post again for day 16, but I have a court date I might have to attend, so things will be hectic.)